So, of course I feel like absolute poo at the moment. Brad Paisley and I had residual interactions post official break up texts. Me saying how I felt used, hurt and betrayed. Him saying that it had to be done because he couldn’t fake it / force it anymore. He also ripped me a new one and definitely touched upon some good points. Shall we dive right in?
He said that I wasn’t reading what he was saying because he insisted that I was great person and that that was not the reason for his change of heart. He said he just lost the spark and was no longer romantically interested in me. He said that was absolutely normal and that I couldn’t be mad at him for that.
For me, I just wanted to know where the spark went and when was it snuffed because I was totally unaware. There must be another reason, that he just won’t say. Which is fine, I mean that plays into me feeling more shitty but whatevs.
He also said that he has to be with someone that he is whole heatedly head over heels in love with and that wasn’t me! (ouch much?) That hurt because I was falling, and thought he was too.
Then he said, me not fully grasping what he was saying gave him confirmation that he obviously made the right decision. In other words you are horrible and I’m glad I dumped you. You know, I think I mentioned this before but guys are always so firm and sure of all they’re decisions. Like me being with him was the worse thing ever and him slamming the door on us had to happen because absolutely for sure we were wrong for each other. Like how does he know that? for sure? 100%?
Man I wish I had that firmness. Being completely confident that every decision I made in my life is the right one. Not giving a crap about anyone else but knowing that this thing has to happen and it has to happen now. It’s nuts but I guess I need some of that.
He also said I put way too much importance on having a relationship. Alright dude you are talking to a girl in her late twenties with all her friends getting married around her. Yah, this is important to me right now. Next phases in life needs to happen and all that. Not to mention that he said the words, marriage, wife and kids to me a couple times, but lets totally disregard that. Also he said that he didn’t want to be with someone who just wanted to be in a relationship just for the sake of being in a relationship. If that was the case I would have just eloped with Tongue Ring, he definitely wanted to keep me around.
Did I miss anything? Oh yeah, him wishing me luck and is confident I’ll find the guy for me. So much confidence this guy has. He is sure I will, I however am definitely not sure I will.
So every time I bring my walls down and get comfortable, I mean real relaxed and at ease. Feeling like yeah, he’s great and we’ll just get to know each other….. the rug gets pulled from under me. Every time that happens a little piece of me goes with the rug… where? idk?
In my eyes he just thought I wasn’t good enough for him or saw something in me that he didn’t like which is fine. I thought the world of him and I guess that’s my flaw right? Just really had high hopes in this one guys.
Needless to say I’m going on a Dating Hiatus.
Golden Rule: Don’t Fall, just don’t. It sucks
Tips For Guys: Do you need any? You guys are pretty much winning at this point.