So ladies I went on my first Tinder date and I am just here to report that it was a success. The first non-creep I have been on a date with in a long time. Let’s just start off with exclaiming how cute he is; like he was cute on the site but even more adorable in real life. I know, I know! It’s usually the opposite right? I lucked out with this one. It’s usually a cute 20 something dude on the site but then a non-well-groomed 40 something dude that shows up to the date. No that never happened to you before? Oh okay then me either. Let’s just move on.
We went out for some dinner at a local sports bar. Nothing too fancy, I am trying to keep it super chill. As you know, I am looking for true love and would usually have our children named by dessert. But not this time, you guys would have been so proud of me. (I still have two of our children secretly named). Let’s call him Picky Eater because that’s what he is. To be fair he is on a major health kick which I thought would be a problem for me. My favorite meal in the world is bacon covered with bacon bits, so yeah the opposite of a healthy eater. I am currently in the process of working on that though. Anyway he ordered a salad with dressing on the side. Like way to make me feel fat lol. Just kidding, I respected his dedication to his diet as I ordered crispy delicious Calamari.
He also hates seafood…. I know what a weirdo. Also kidding, I adore him lol.
We talked and laughed and vibed. At the end of the night we talked a bit more in his car. So as you all know from my plethora of dating mistakes. When I go into cars with guys, I never leave the same if you know what I mean. (wink, wink) But not this time. We actually just talked and he never once tried to make a move. This drove me crazy of course because he was so cute. By the end of the night I realized I would have to make the first move.
So me being the elegant enchantress I am leaned over before we said goodbye and kissed him. It was magical. He wasn’t over bearing or held back, it was the perfect kiss. It was so perfect that I drove home in a daze. I probably should have Ubered. Oh did I mention he walked me to my car and opened my door. I know right?! I met this guy on Tinder.
Sounds too good to be true? Well there is a slight caveat. How do I say this?… I guess I will just say it. He has hook for arms. Nah just kidding. He has children. Yes he is a father and no he isn’t a hundred years old. He is pretty young. He has two children that he adores and they are quite adorable. And yes he told me this before we went on our date. He was just so nice and polite that it simply didn’t matter.
What do you guys think? Am I making a good decision here?
Let’s keep in mind; it’s only been one date. I am just going with the flow with this one.
Golden Rule: On a first date wear something slutty enough so that you don’t have to make the first move. I wore a backless romper but it didn’t do the trick.
Tips for guys: I actually have none, I found a guy that made me believe that decent guys aren’t extinct or kidnapped by aliens.